Okay, this is getting a little twidiculous. Since the launch of Twitter, there have been a multitude of websites and applications that take advantage of Twitter’s open API and make it easier for Twitter to consume more and more hours of your time that you should spend working or talking face-to-face with your loved ones. (you know who you are!)
But for some reason, many of these sites have taken on Twitter’s “Tw” as a way to instantly Twitterize anything. It’s like telling everyone, “Hey! This has to do with Twitter!” In the real world, you’d write a poem or type a letter. On twitter, you twite a twoem or twype a twetter.
Twitter's mascot
Sure, for a while we loved to put “e” or “i” or “my” in front of our domain names to tell the world how “electronic” or “internet” or “self involved” we were. But the Tw virus (or “twirus” as I call it) is much worse than that. We’re not just putting it in front of the word – we’re actually changing the spelling.
What do you call a gathering of Twitterers in your city, meeting for fun and charity? Why a Twestival, of course! Stay up to date with the latest twendz and twemes.
They’re not even called Twitter apps anymore. They’re Twapps. Why use three syllables when you can use one?
In real life, if you ask a question, you get an answer. On Twitter, you get a Twanswer. After you give them your Twitter login and password, of course. Perhaps someone should start “Twacker” that just steals your login and password and gives you nothing in return.
Twitdom even Twitterizes the description of their site. “Twitdom is a database maintained by fellow tweeple like you.” Tweeple?! ARGH!
Twitter video? Twiddeo. Digg it? Twiggit.
Would you like to see an organized history of your tweets? No? Well Twistory is going to give it to you anyway! It’s enough to make me wanna twuke.
And this one really made me wanna punch a blue bird in the face: If you’ve broken up with your boyfriend or girlfriend on Twitter (and who amongst us hasn’t) you’ve just been Twumped. Oh, the twumanity!
For all you NFL fans out there, check out Twootball for all NFL-related tweets. Twouchdown!
Not only does Twictur.es take advantage of the Tw prefix, it also uses the .es SUFFIX! That site must be run by a bunch of genius.es. (or twenius.es….)
My tweyes are gonna twop out of my twead!
But twhere’s twe twite twat twakes twevery tword twin twa twentence twand tweplaces twit twith twa Tw?
This is getting out of twontrol. I think we all need to take a Twitter fast (sure, let’s call it a twast) and just go back to a boring old form of Internet communication…
Twe-mail, anyone?